Love is a War, and Happy Anniversary

Love is a battlefield…What About Love…Heartbreak Warfare… There isn’t a shortage of songs that deal with the trials and tribulations of relationships. Using warlike symbolism seems to be a common motif; and for good reason. Relationships are tough! Sometimes they feel like an all-out war.

I have been married for almost 8 years. Today, October 14th 2014, marks nine years since I started dating my wife. It hasn’t always been easy either. Like most relationships, there have been plenty ups and downs caused by both parties. At times, the downs have almost been too much for either one of us…but yet, here we still are.

I know the exact moment I fell in love with my wife. I don’t know if many people can say that, but I can. During the beginning stages of our relationship, we spent most of our time on her parent’s front porch—mainly because I was terrified of her father, whom had a grudge against me, primarily based on my last name. I didn’t blame him. We LaBees are shifty, godless, people!

My wife and I shared a lot of our big firsts, in either her parent’s front yard or on their front porch. We would stand, in the cold—our courtship started in
the particularly cold fall of 2005—for hours talking about anything and everything, and more importantly we would laugh; a lot.

On one particular evening, I made a joke that fell particularly flat, and in order to recover, I pantomimed tying a fake noose and then hanging myself, as if to say ‘’look at me, I’m dying here!’. Without missing a beat, my wife pretended to grab a pair of fake scissors, cut me free, and then catch my large, tumbling, frame before it hit the cement. We both laughed hard, for what felt like hours after that. That’s when I knew, this girl gets me, and I’m going to do whatever it takes to keep her.

I would be lying if I didn’t admit we have had our share of rough patches. But, anytime I think it would be easier to just walk away, I remember that front porch. I remember the hours of laughter that we shared…I remember how I fell in love with my wife over a simple joke. Then I remember how many laughs there have been since the porch; there have been a lot of them. We have shared countless great moments with one another. My wife gets me; sometimes I think she might be the ONLY person that does.

A true friend is someone who knows every one of your flaws—big or small—and still chooses to keep you in their life. Sometimes, relationships get stale and you don’t know where to go. You can chase that new relationship feeling—the one that everyone thinks about, and if you say you don’t, you’re lying to me and to yourself—but the truth is, the new will always become old, but to find someone who really understands you, never will.

I honestly married my best friend.

Love…marriage…can be a battlefield, especially if neither of you are willing to drop your guard, but I think my wife and I are ready to sign a peace treaty.

We won’t always get along, but that is normal. Best friends fight sometimes. I can’t guaruntee that we wont fight or hit another rough patch, but I am certain that neither of us is ready to give up on each other. I also know, we both could use a little more porch time.

I love you Amber LaBee, and thank you for loving me despite everything…

Happy Anniversary.


3 thoughts on “Love is a War, and Happy Anniversary

  1. i can’t tell if it’s because I’m so hormonal from having another baby, whether it’s because I’ve had a particularly shitty day, or a combination of the two but this post made me cry lol. Because I can totally relate. Every relationship goes through some truly awful times (the definition of awful is diff for everyone) but fighting through Is what sets your relationship apart! I feel the same way about Tyler and I know he feels that way about me. Isn’t it great being married to your best friend!? Happy Anniversary friends!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Ill take that Erica! I appreciate any kind of emotion my writing can bring out in someone. And you’re so right, being married to your best friend can be amazing…but it takes a lot of work! lol Thanks for the comment and the support. 🙂


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